Engagement Ring Tradition and Practices Around the Wrold

In prehistoric times, man tied grass around his wife-to-be wrists and ankles to protect him from evil spirits. This resembles a recent African tradition of tying the bride and groom’s wrists together using grass strands.

The Romans first began to use plain iron bands as engagement rings. It was typically worn on the fourth finger on the woman’s left hand because it was believed that a vein in this finger traveled directly to her heart. It was customary then for the men to give gold rings for their bride-to-be to wear during the wedding and special occasions, and another one made of iron for her to wear daily.

In ancient Egypt, however, rings made of costly metals were ordinarily used as a currency for trade, and a man who placed a ring upon his wife’s finger meant that he trusted her with his wealth. Similarly, in medieval days, the ring also served as a dowry or payment for a wife.

In the Middle East in Asia, puzzle rings were given by sultans and sheiks to each of their brides. This was how they " tagged” their many wives and ensured their loyalty to their husbands.

The first recorded incident of an engagement ring containing a diamond was in 1477. The Archduke Maximilian of Austria pledged his love and commitment to marry his beloved Mary of Burgundy with a gold ring decorated with diamonds making the shape of the lady’s initial, M. It was only two years later when another royal, Constanzo Sforza, gifted his bride, Camilla d’Aragona, a diamond ring on the day of their wedding. It was no surprise that only men from wealthy families and royalty could present diamond rings to their beloved as these stones were a precious and rare commodity and highly expensive.

In the 1700s, engagement rings called “posie rings” containing lines of poetry and messages of love carved on the inside of the ring were exchanged by lovers. These were initially silver bands replaced with gold ones during the wedding.

For the Hebrews, rings made of gold or silver were the norm, while in Northern Europe, gold, silver, and copper were the metals of choice. It was only in the 1800s that gems and decorative stones were incorporated into engagement rings in Europe. Rings with endearing words like Love, Eternity, and Forever spelled out with jewels became fashionable during the 1800s. But it wasn’t only precious stones and metals that the highly romantic and sentimental Victorians used to make their jewelry. They also used their beloved’s hair, gemstones, and precious metals. This romanticism regarding engagement was greatly influenced by Queen Victoria, who was madly in love with her husband then, an uncommon thing with arranged marriages among the royalty of this period.

It was also during the latter part of this period when diamonds and precious gems were discovered in a mine in Cape Colony in South Africa, effectively increasing the supply of the highly valued gem in the world. Around d 1886, Tiffany & Co. first released its Tiffany setting, a band with a diamond raised on a six-prong mount that maximized the diamond’s brilliance and cut. Since then, engagement rings have taken on this design, which has become women’s preference worldwide.

The sale of diamonds declined in the 1930s during the lean economic times. De Beers, the sole diamond mining and manufacturing company operating the newly discovered mines in Africa at the time, launched an aggressive campaign to boost the sales of diamonds again. They launched the classic slogan, “A Diamond is Forever,” and immediately saw a boost in their sales. The connotation between marriage and a diamond being indestructible became deeply ingrained in the American psyche with the popularity of this new slogan. It is no surprise then that in most department stores, engagement rings soon became the best sellers in every jewelry line.

After the rise in popularity of diamond engagement rings, it became a tradition for a man to ask for his lady love’s hand in marriage with a ring.

The modern custom of proposing marriage to a woman with a diamond ring has become the standard practice among many countries and cultures worldwide. However, many countries still have their own marriage proposal traditions unique to their culture. The Western practice has overtaken some of these practices, but some are still in practice today. Some are relatively new practices that have been adapted from modern innovations and the sheer creativity of men. These unique marriage proposals are mentioned below as they are practiced by different cultures or regions worldwide.

A new style of proposed marriage is on the rise in many modern countries in Asia. This is known as the flash mob proposal, where a group of people collaborates with the future groom, who makes his proposal with a song, dance, or any other production that involves a big crowd.

In India and Pakistan, where arranged marriages are still practiced, it is not only the bridegroom but his entire family that makes the formal marriage proposal to the bride’s entire family. In some deeply traditional families, the couple is not involved in the engagement rites. In Pakistan, once the bride’s family accepts the proposed marriage, an engagement party ensues where the future groom can propose to the future bride in person.

In China, traditional Chinese culture is still deeply ingrained in the marriage preparation rites. Weddings for them are a joining together of two individuals and families. Therefore, even if a marriage proposal is initiated by the giving of an engagement ring, traditional practices like the woman introducing the man to her family, the man seeking the blessing from the woman’s family before the proposal, and the two families together acknowledging the engagement and casting their blessing of approval upon the couple are all part of the engagement tradition.

In Thailand, engagement and wedding traditions and customs are still widely followed by families. A ceremonial rite called “Thong Mun” marks a couple’s engagement. Here, the future groom presents a gift of gold to his prospective bride and her family. Dowry negotiations between the two families also follow this.

In Europe, the tradition of men proposing to women while on one knee, with a ring in hand, is still very much in practice. The engagement ring, however, is normally worn on the third finger of the woman’s left hand as opposed to the common practice in the USA of wearing it on the fourth finger instead.

In the UK and Ireland, a peculiar tradition that used to be common is a woman initiating the marriage proposal to the man. This may only be done every leap year on the 29th of February. This tradition is seldom if ever, practiced anymore.

A couple’s engagement must be formally announced among the British through a church bulletin called “the banns.” This served as notice to anyone who may oppose the couple’s marriage and to give a legal reason why the marriage must not occur.

In Germany and Sweden, both the bride-to-be and the groom-to-be wear engagement rings during the engagement period.

An old African tradition is still being practiced in engagement rites in Ghana. This involves knocking on the door of the woman’s home during the proposal visit. The groom-to-be’s mother and uncle are the ones who perform the knock on the door during a visit to the woman’s family when they propose marriage on behalf of the groom.

In some Kenyan tribes, a man intends to marry a woman by sending her beads. Keeping the beads means the woman accepts the proposal, after which her family will present her with an adornment to add to these beads to signify their acceptance of the engagement between the two.

These are just among the many practices and traditions associated with engagement and marriage. Every culture holds its own views on how a couple’s engagement must proceed. Even with modern styles and practices, celebrating the engagement between two people always brings families and communities together in one way or another.